Hi Toggles,

Oy, this is a tough one. You love him and you want to be with him, that’s obvious. And on paper, seems like he’s a good fit–good family, decent job, mellow, an all around good guy. In my experience, these are the toughest situations to deal with because nothing is so obviously bad. It’s not like he’s cheated on you or he abuses you or anything. He just gets out of hand when he’s drunk and says things he says later on that he doesn’t mean.

Hmmmm….

I think that there is some part of you that doesn’t want to be with someone who treats that way–and ps, that is a not nice ‘way’ to treat someone (some people drink and they’re happy and fun, not flip out on their gf). Go with your gut and go home and recuperate, even though your heart may not agree. I tell you I’ve been through a very similar situation and drama like that is always an indication that something else is going on. And that will always pop up in your relationship, and since it comes from within him, there will be nothing you can do to stop it. Save yourself. When the shit hits the fan–and it will–you’ll have no one to lean on there in London, and you won’t be as strong as you are now, not if you move in together, because there will be more you feel like you have to lose.

Good luck, girl.

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