Hi Trixie,

We had this too. I hate to say this, but Throw Money At It. Go onto Care.com and hire someone. When we did this we got dozens of emails. The people were OK. Even if it’s just once a week. Even if it dips into your/her savings. Remember, God rested on the seventh day, you can too! Get a schedule. None of this, “Oh, I can come on Wednesday but not Tuesday of next week”. No, have a regular, constant person. Then you can plan. When her friends ask, “If there’s anything I can do…” say YES, and BE SPECIFIC! The church ladies (there are always those ladies) if she knows them are great. The neighbors. The visiting aunt. But my main takeaway is to hire someone.

Also, you can take care of your mother, work, and/or be with your family. On any given day, Pick Two. Don’t try to do it all in one day. That saved our sanity. You are also being a good example for how YOU or THEY would be treated if any of you were sick.

Another option is for Mom to stay with you or to have a good kid (student) stay with her rent free to make sure she gets to appointments, is taken care of, runs errands. As long as Mom knows Kid has to go to classes once in a while. We kind of had this but didn’t plan for it. A friend needed a place and we said, “Stay with Mom in case she breaks her hip”. She was spry at the time, but over the years our OCD friend TOTALLY made her life SO much easier!! He didn’t “do” anything really, but he was THERE, which was the invaluable thing! Know what I mean?

Good Luck!

Inky

• This reply was modified 9 years, 6 months ago by Inky.