Dear Sweet:
I do like getting your messages: you are a welcome person in my life. You wrote that your husband is not afraid, that men are not afraid- no, no, no… I disagree. Men are afraid. Your husband probably have less fear than you having been eight years in the country you are in, but I remember a line from a poem: “Every one of us has to live with fear.” No way, in my mind, with my experience in life, no way anybody at all is free from fear. And my husband is afraid. At first I didn’t think so- that was my child like immature thinking, believing the “grown ups” especially the men, have it all together… This is a distorted thinking that leads to a lot of the conflicts you describe. This false belief that you, Sweet are afraid and he, your husband is free from fear. He may act confident but I have no doubt he is sometimes afraid. No doubt. He is human first, man second.

I like it that you don’t have time for the fights you used to have, that you figured it is not effective with the less time that you have. Good, good, good I say!

I feel an increase of stress, as if I am often too caffeinated these days, even this very morning. I don’t know what it is. Could be coffee but I feel this way into the afternoons and evenings… I don’t know. I am uptight.

I am going to ask my husband who have more knowledge of such things if leaving email address on a forum like this can be a problem. Maybe you can ask your husband or someone who has more knowledge on such a matter?

Till later (and can you write to me your thoughts about men and fear, your husband and fear- did I misunderstand or do you really think he is not afraid?
anita