Anita hits the nail on the head.

If it helps, I feel very similar to you.
I’m in a job I hate too (Insurance) and I’m also very creative and very introverted.

I know I’d feel the same if I were in the position you’ve agreed to be in.
Right now, you need to take care of yourself or you’ll feel further depressed and out of control of your situation.

I had a really bad depressive episode this afternoon after work until a little while ago, so maybe I’m not the ideal candidate to give out advice.

However, I felt better after being open with my step-dad’s parents.
I’d not seen them in about a year, as I usually hide when people I don’t see regularly are round.
Especially when I don’t feel good about myself.
I had a really shit day. Work is getting me down and sometimes I ask myself ‘What is the actual point, in anything?’
It feels like life is too hard, the World is too broken and I’ll never fit in.

But things are always changing.
I think they can also remain the same, if we don’t take control.
It’s easy to be a passenger and take zero action – and then wonder why things aren’t better.

Power to you for leaving an environment that doesn’t work for you.
This is an opportunity for something new, but unless you believe in yourself (easier said that done, when you’re feeling defeated), you’ll probably end up in the same position because I’ve left lame jobs before – quit without something else lined up.
And here I am, in another job just like the one before – all because I needed money and my CV made getting another similar job easy.

So I certainly don’t have the answers but … you do.
It’s not working for you being at your boyfriends parents house.

You have a choice now.

You either carry on the way you are and feel exhausted keeping up an act.
Or, you discuss with them that you’re an introvert and don’t want to come across as rude or ungrateful, but living in their house makes you uncomfortable and you NEED time to yourself, because that’s the way you’re built.
The curse of the creative, I guess.
Or, you leave the situation – up to you how you do that part.

Anita has told you not to leave the job, but it’s clearly too late for that.
No regrets though.
Embrace your choices and make the best of what you’ve got yourself into.

It’ll be a struggle, but that is life isn’t it?

My number one piece of advice is to make YOU a priority.
Take the time to be alone and be creative.

Or cry, if it helps.
But don’t let yourself feel self-pity over and over.
It won’t change a thing.

– Stefan