Hello again Carlos,

I think this situation was way too familiar for me, but of course it is unique to you, which is why I was trying to open up about the things that I have learned and checking if they may be plausible. It seems as if you two have opened up to each other and you have demonstrated that you care and are willing to give her space. Have you done anything to show her that you can give her space? Or maybe think about whether or not there were any issues in the relationship?

You said, “even though I am hurting, I feel a little relieved that I don’t want to experience those highs and lows.” I understand what you are saying. Could it be possible that she feels this way as well? – That if she can stay away then you will be able to be happy and so will she? She did say that she was afraid to get hurt and to hurt you.

I am in a similar situation as you are, I’m just taking things one day at a time and learning more about what makes a good relationship and the communication styles of men and women. If you are looking for advice as to what to do, then I think you are right that you may be a good match, but now is not the right time. Once she has learned how to deal with her fears then she can work on the relationship and give you what you need so that both of you can be happy. If not, then you still know that it wasn’t your fault and there was nothing you could do about it. There are mental/emotional walls that she has to bring down on her own before she can feel comfortable letting another person in. For now, enjoy being single and learn more about good relationships or date other people.

• This reply was modified 9 years, 3 months ago by Annie.