Dear vinni:

i must say I like it that she is very clear with you, that she is assertive. I am sad for you that you lost not only your job but the most important person in your life. This is very unfortunate and your pain is understandable, the pain of loss and your inability, as hard as you tried, to get her back.

But back to her decisiveness and assertiveness, at least you have that; knowing her position and not having to guess about it. At least you know. You don’t have your old job and you don’t have her, but you have this knowing: that she is done with you and that indeed there is nothing you can do about it.

This kind of pain that you are going through, with knowing clearly what is going on (it is over), you can overcome it, with time. The pain will ease up and you will feel better and better… and you will love again and you will be loved, again.

You already took responsibility for your behaviors that contributed to the breakup and you will notice in the future, in your next relationship, when things get tough, to not reject your loving partner,but to allow her to comfort you and help you.

There is this other thing: even without your rejecting her for two months, it is possible that the relationship would have ended anyway: there are other factors, some which you mentioned. You don’t know all there is to know about those other factors and probably, there is no point in knowing. But it is not ALL YOUR doing.

Please do post again and again, for as long as you need to…

anita