Dear HippieChick:

I was not in a similar situation to yours: I don’t have children, minor or adult.

I am suggesting that at the beginning of the meeting with him, you discuss the rules-of-interaction with him: that you want it to be respectful, no accusations, no blaming: that when you express your feeling, or he expresses a feeling, each talk with the pronoun I: as I feel this or that, and not with the pronoun You as in: You did this or that to me…

So each takes responsibility to one’s own feelings.

Respect and sincerity, both.

In relation to your daughter, i assume you both want what is best for her and that would be the aim. As far as closure of your relationship with him, the closure he is seeking: ask what kind of closure he needs, what kind of closure he is aiming at before you discuss the closure. Make everything as clear as possible, structured as possible, like a well organized business meeting.

Please do post again.

anita