Hi, Anita! I hope you’re doing well. I’m much better now thank God. I just would like to have your opinion and the communities opinion in general. I seem to keep going through emotions of being mad at her, to forgiving her to not and etc… I’m about to explain it to you. Can you tell me what you think?

My ex-girlfriend was very sweet. She made me a book of our pictures for a gift, was so sweet to me and nice to me in front of her family. She made sure I was comfortable when I slept at her house. She was there a lot of the times for me and helped me out with some work I had. She had many good qualities. She once had a one-hour layover airport at the city I was staying in and came out to see me then went back in, so she’s great in many ways.

But she also did many negative things. Whenever we argued she had a big temper. She’d insult me and then we end up insulting each other back and forth (I’m guilty and wrong of this too) but it’d always end with her saying she thinks we should have a break or break up or take a day off and me apologizing. She’d go through episodes every once and a while of being cold and almost ignoring me for a few days to a week. She’d call me to tell me she feels distant, and once told me her friend told her that she doesn’t think my girlfriend loves me (this was after a fight we had and she was venting to this friend). She insulted me to the point where I went from this very confident guy at the beginning of the relationship to this very insecure guy by close to the end. She uses to insult my personality. Saying I have “no balls” as in I’m a coward. She once told me in a group chat with my friend that she likes men that stand up for themselves and I asked if she thinks I’m like that in the group. She said no, that I’m “tame” which really upset me and it started a huge fight that almost led to a breakup (if I didn’t beg her to stay as usual) that was 8 days before the breakup mentioned in the previous posts you’ve helped me with.

With all the almost breakups, her telling me she feels distant or depressed by sitting their skyping with me instead of going out and a lot of the mean things I lost my confidence to the point to when she told me she wants to meet Zayn Malik (my cousins are friends with his girlfriend). I asked her why and she said because she liked how he looks. That would of never gotten to me if I was my usual self but it did.

Post-breakup she was taking pictures with guys and writing “bae” or putting hearts. She even told me she was glad we broke up. Later she came back and apologised for those both things saying it shows she didn’t care which isn’t true (according to her). As of now she’s removed every trace of me off her Facebook and Instagram. She’s been cold to me again. Like you said she is changeable (I talked to her once last time 3 weeks ago after I told you how nice she was being). She said she was glad and etc… While I was saying things to her like I still care about her and will always love her. Asked her to never be a stranger and stay friends. If she ever needs anything she can always ask. (Still true) but anyways we’ve become strangers. She didn’t even bother congratulating me on my recently born nephew (2 weeks old!)

I get mad, really mad to the point where I don’t even wanna see her. But I can’t find it in myself to hate her. I still love her, but I don’t know how I should feel about her. A lot of mixed feelings are happening. I look at the things she wrote that were sweet or see a picture of us and I feel like she really did love me, but then when I remember all the negatives I mentioned above I really don’t know if she does. If she loved me as me or loved having a boyfriend because it seems like I was so much more into it and devoted to her.

What do you think about her, honestly? Do you think she loved me or not really? Also her birthday is in 10 days should I say happy birthday to her or not? Part of me wants to but I just don’t know.

Thank you so much for taking the time to help me out I really appreciate it.