Thank you all again, I feel like I have been making some solid progress.

Everything you are posting here is great! you are in a sense talking yourself through your current situation. We all just happen to be in the bleachers screaming and cheering like at a grand final!

Matty, thank you so much for spending so much time on your replies. You’be been offering me a great deal of insight that I don’t know if I would have gotten if I hadn’t had a few people to bounce ideas off of.

You would hate me, i cried recently watching the animated movie ‘The little prince’

I doubt I would dislike you! haha I just don’t seem to handle other people’s emotions well. I often feel like I’m someone who is holding everyone else together. So I don’t want that in my relationship as well.

This more than anything else will cause you sadness and depression. You just have to work on slowly changing your perceptions of the ideal, it will take time, but start to ‘soften’ your ideal.

I really want to make the change! But I’m not sure what my first step would be. I’ve been going over and over everyone’s comments on here about me and my problem, trying to figure out what I want and need.

Anita, thank you as well for assisting me.

My family both had strong opinions about things. (There wasn’t a lot of room for negotiation.) So often my parents would butt heads. It never seemed to bother me. To be honest, I never paid them much attention when they were fighting.

I can’t recall often my parent showing soft emotions, not because they didn’t have them, I just think it was a weird time. We didn’t really have many problems we had to face. Or if we did, my parents never let me in on what they were.