Thank you both. I do keep a journal. One of the joys of trying to be a writer- I keep more than one journal. It’s a little odd to write 100 pages in a journal over the last month, so obviously this has weighed heavily on my mind. There are days when I think I’m doing OK,but then something small happens and I crash down again. Or something happens that leads me to think there may be a chance to get back together, or a chance to talk through things- whatever. I know I need to detach from her, but that seems impossible right now because we have 19 years of being together. It’s a lot of history to say “I’m no longer attached to you” and walk away from such a huge part of my world.

I’m sure a time will come where I move forward, but I need it to be soon because I’m not sure how many more times I can hit the bottom.

Anyway, thanks.