Hey

Like you say it sounds like you need to talk to somebody and let all out a bit. I would suggest your parents unless you have a good reason not to. If not your parents then a friend that you feel comfortable with. Basically somebody who you feel will respond in a positive way. When you’re young it’s sometimes good to have somebody older that you can talk to who sees things from a different perspective. (Parents or family are generally best) If there’s really nobody (and I doubt that) then maybe online is a good place. Which you are kind of doing right now. Although I think someone you know, face to face is generally best.

Also let me just say one of the things I’ve learnt is that there is no harm at all in letting your guard down and being vulnerable with people you trust. In fact it’s a very necessary thing sometimes.

I also agree with Pat that suffering is suffering. Don’t feel bad about how you feel.

Good luck 🙂