Nico your story really does tug at the heart-strings! You found your way into a dark place, but in the darkness is when light shines the brightest. You said it yourself that the people around you won’t and can’t provide the support you need in your life right now, so you need to quit looking for it there. You need to get involved in areas where supportive, like-minded people are. As Matt said, this community is very supportive, but you will need more than that to pull yourself back out. Get involved in some hobbies instead of worrying so much about school and work right now. Those things are important, but until you stabilize your mind and your personal life, school and work will never be stable. Get involved and find people that you like to spend time with and that will be supportive of your feelings and goals. Its really not very difficult to meet people if you have common interests, so go wherever your heart leads you. When you start to build even a few people who you can come to and be yourself, and that support you, then you will be able to start rebuilding yourself. Until then just bide your time, and I would spend as little time as possible interacting with the toxic people in your life and staying out and about away from home. Just keep putting one foot in front of the other, things will get better, it’s always darkest before the dawn!

-Dave
http://personal-growth-project.com