Topic: Finding Meaning………
I am almost finished my Master’s Degree in Public Administration. December!
I am currently working as a contractor assistant for a large oil company (You know those things you may find on a beach?!?) I am the oldest peron in my office (43). I dont get much respect. I print when they dont feel like printing their own documents. I file when they dont feel like filing. I do some other things – but the ones that bother me most are the ones they dont ‘feel’ like doing. While they meander through the hallways having conversation. I dont get included in lunches, after work socials or conversations. I could just go on and on …
I want to find work in the education field. I am a New Orleanian and I want to be a part of school operations. School is ever changing around here. I dont want to teach. I want to be a part of making sure scores and monies are correctly being appropriated. I want to be a part of the positive eductional changes that every child in this area deserves. I pay for my daughter to attend school. But not all have that luxury. I know that I can be a positive force in this field. I am of zest, grit, self-control, hope, love, social intelligence, gratitude, and I have a sense of humor!
I feel lost. Job searching is not easy. I worry that my weight will stop me. I want to be more confident. I want to lead. I hate what is happening to me. But I like venting!!
And even though I have made up my mind that I would not … why wouldnt they want to hire me here? Its very demeaning. I have as mucn or more education and experience than the 23 year olds they do hire?!? Oh just forget I said that! Ugh!
Happy Friday! <3 Sending love, hope and joy for the weekend!
Quick! What are the first few things that come to mind when you hear “Stoic?” You probably think someone who is emotionless, maybe a sad face.
Stoicism is actually a great philosophy that I personally believe is the ultimate self-improvement philosophy. I’ve actually written an article on the subject, but I’ll try to briefly summarize it here.
The Stoics main goal is to remove or minimize all negative emotions from their lives. Negative emotions include: anger, sadness, dissatisfaction, etc. Their other goal is to learn to truly appreciate everything in life.
They achieve both goals through multiple mental practices that you can do on a daily basis.
The first technique they use is called “Negative Visualization.”
Here is an excerpt from my article so you can get an idea of negative visualization:
In a nutshell, negative visualization is the periodic practice of imagining the worst-case scenario almost at all times. You should mentally picture losing the ones you cherish the most and imagine being at your lowest.
You may think doing this would raise a pessimist out of you, but in actuality Stoicism forms full-grown optimists who don’t take things for granted, but instead love every second of life’s fortunes.
One of the examples from the book contrasts two fathers. One father plays with his daughter and obviously loves her, however, he does not spend every second truly treasuring her current presence. To him there is always tomorrow to spend time with her. The second father knows that life is short and fleeting. He truly loves his daughter as much as the first, but he does not take a moment for granted as he constantly and consciously thinks about her mortality.
Now tragically both daughters have passed away. The first father is miserable and is a complete train wreck, feeling guilty for having taken her presence for granted. The second father, emotionally damaged as the first, can take solace in the idea that he took advantage of every second he could with his beloved daughter and mentally prepared for her passing on a daily basis. There was nothing he could have done that had not already been done.
This practice makes you realize you are very fortunate to be enjoying your current possessions, whether material or psychological (you could be insane and mentally broken.) You begin to hold what you have in higher value as you’re living life and you begin to be grateful for everything while simultaneously preparing you in case of tragic loss.
Another idea that Stoicism tackles is the problem of “hedonic adaptation.” We all assume more money = more happiness right? Well… The truth is more like more money means temporary increases in happiness, but then you baseline and return to your previous state of happiness with more desires. It’s also called a hedonic treadmill and you can see why.
Stoics counter the hedonic treadmill by consciously wanting what they have. Whoa! Did you ever think about that? That’s a whole new level to gratitude. Being grateful and thinking about how lucky you are isn’t enough. You have to consciously want what you already have.
I didn’t want to make this forum post TOO long, but I do go more in-depth to Stoicism and even make book recommendations on the subject. I don’t think I’m breaking the no new thread for just self-promotion rule because this article is highly relevant in this case.
Hope you guys consider giving Stoicism a chance! I’d love to see a discussion kick off here.
“Joy is what happens to us when we allow ourselves to recognize how good things really are.” ~ Marianne Williamson
One moment of gratitude can lift your spirits, shift your perception and change your life.
Use this discussion thread to share 3 things you’re grateful for today.
Here’s what I’m grateful for today:
1. My husband, for making me a cup of coffee in my favourite mug this morning.
2. Time to write and work on something I enjoy
3. This new community, for allowing me to connect with like-minded people from all over the world.
What are you grateful for today?