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Posts tagged with “numb”

The 3 Ms That Help Me Cope with Seasonal Depression

“The word ‘happy’ would lose its meaning if it were not balanced by sadness.” ~Carl Jung

My two-year-old son looked up at me with his big, blue, beautiful eyes.

He wanted me to play. I took a toy car in my hand and rolled it along the wooden living room floor we were both sitting on, making an enthusiastic VROOM as I did it. He smiled. He appreciated my effort at sound effects.

The streetlights standing on the road outside our living room window were already glowing warmly, even though it was barely 4:30 p.m. and the sky was …

All the Ways I Tried to Numb My Loneliness and What Actually Helped

“A season of loneliness and isolation is when the caterpillar gets its wings.” ~Mandy Hale

I feel so alone right now. Like, crawling out of my skin, I’ll do anything I can do to not feel this way alone.

I haven’t felt this way in a long time. Thank goodness I have tools to take care of myself. Let me explain.

My earliest childhood memory is my mother’s empty bed. The sheets are white, untucked, and messy.  The duvet cover is loose and hanging halfway on the floor. The room is quiet, there’s no sign of mom, and I …

Disordered Eating: What We Need to Understand and How to Heal

“Food can distract you from your pain but food cannot take away your pain.” ~Karen Salmansohn

Long before I was watching The Biggest Loser (a popular weight loss reality TV series) and trying to look like a swimsuit model, I was hiding in my closet eating candy, fiercely addicted to sugar.

I remember feeling completely out of control over my cravings for all things sweet, and I didn’t know how to stop myself from eating until I felt sick. Food played a bigger role in my life than simply to support the processes in my body that lead to optimal …

How Boys Learn to Repress Their Feelings and How We Can Do Better as Men

“Shoutout to all the men going through a lot, with no one to turn to, because this world wrongly taught our males to mask their emotions and that strong means silent.” ~Alex Myles

He is close to tears. He is not physically hurt. No ankle has been twisted, no knee has been scraped, nobody needs their asthma inhaler.

The other boys are making fun of his size.

Most of the time he pretends it doesn’t bother him. But I’m the coach, and it’s pretty hard to miss.

I have watched him smile and try to shake it off. Sometimes he …

How I Reclaimed My Life When I Felt Numb and Unhappy

“All appears to change when we change.” ~Henri-Frédéric Amiel

The biggest life-changing moment in my life would have looked unremarkable to an outsider looking in.

I was at a point in my life (my late twenties) where everything seemed to look good on paper. I had a great job, I was living in downtown Seattle, and I enjoyed the live music scene. Aside from not being in a relationship, I thought I had “arrived.”

The only problem was, I was miserable, and I barely acknowledged it. A part of me knew that I wasn’t happy, but I tried to …

When You Feel Like You’re Going Nowhere and Life Has No Point

“If you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change.” ~Wayne Dyer

How many days do you wake up feeling like you’re a hamster on a wheel? You brush your teeth, take a shower, drink your coffee, go to work, come home, eat dinner, watch television, go to bed, and rinse and repeat.

Do you wonder how you can keep going and keep everything together when it feels like you’re doing nothing, going nowhere, and living some life you weren’t meant for?

Do you ever wonder what to do on those days where you feel …

Do You Feel Stuck, Overwhelmed, and Dissatisfied?

“Everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but all the happiness and growth occurs while you’re climbing it.” ~Andy Rooney

I was born and raised in Louisiana, where food, booze, and fun are the three most important things in most every social situation.

I had my license at fourteen, my first drink at fifteen, and I knew the owner of the local drive-through daiquiri bar by name. (Miss Billy, in case you were wondering.) It wasn’t out of the ordinary. We all drank a lot on the weekends…who doesn’t?!

In college, when my parents were going through a …

Are You Running Away from Yourself?

“No matter where you go, there you are.” ~Confucius

I am accustomed to not moving. To move was to feel pain—the pain of seeing how worthless I believed myself to be. Sometimes I would sit in the same place for hours, sometimes not leaving the house for days.

By isolating myself, I avoided finding evidence in the outside world that proved how I saw myself was the absolute truth.

My worst nightmare was that others would show me (through what they said or didn’t say, or what they did or didn’t do) that they too found me as rotten as …

Are You Shut Down and Disconnected?

“When we get too caught up in the busyness of the world, we lose connection with one another—and ourselves.” ~Jack Kornfield

I had to work on Easter at my job in a coffee shop. I missed out on my family’s big holiday party, and I struggled with quite a bit of resentment about the whole deal. I could have gotten someone to cover for me, but because I’m one of the more experienced employees and we were short-staffed, I was told that I needed to work.

I wasn’t too terribly happy. I came in to work and immediately launched into …