July 2, 2021 at 10:08 am #382290
im 17, I recently just stop because its wrong to read that kind of stuff and im kinda getting over it. Its just the fact that I read that kind of stuffs about my idols lingers in my mind and im so guilty. Btw, thankyouu.
graceJuly 2, 2021 at 10:48 am #382300
You are welcome. The purpose of the feeling of guilt is to motivate us to correct wrong behaviors. When you stopped watching that kind of stuff, you corrected your wrong behavior, the feeling of guilt has served its purpose, and is no longer required.
In the future, you will feel guilty again about other things, and when you do, you will need to figure out if your guilt is based on a wrong behavior (sometimes we feel guilty regarding behaviors that are not wrong), and if your answer is yes, that your guilt is based on a wrong behavior- you will need to correct/ change or stop that behavior.
Being a good person does not mean never behaving wrongly (an impossibility); it means noticing and then correcting wrong behaviors. Does this make sense to you?
anitaJuly 2, 2021 at 11:05 am #382305
Yes this will surely help me, I’m having anxiety attacks because I felt like what I did was very wrong and I cause a huge harm to my idols and I wish I didn’t read fictions like that. I feel like im the only one who does this and its very disturbing. I just want to go back to what it used to be. And thank you very much for helping and answering this means a lot.😊July 2, 2021 at 11:19 am #382308
You are very welcome. Do your best to take a long break from the guilt you’ve been feeling for too long, and relax. Take a walk outside or listen to calming music now, or something like that whenever you feel badly, and repeat to yourself that every single person on the face of the earth does wrong from time to time, but good people correct their wrong behaviors, and that you are one of the good people!
anitaJuly 3, 2021 at 12:42 am #382333
Should I stay away from my fandom for a while? Because it makes me awful that what I have read and im afraid im harming them or sexualizing them and it keeps on popping on my head. But I dont wanna leave I love them.
graceJuly 3, 2021 at 6:47 am #382337
Staying away from your fandom for a while makes sense. You don’t have to stay away forever, just for now, for the next hour, maybe the whole day.
“I’m afraid I’m harming them”- how can you possibly harm them?
anitaJuly 3, 2021 at 6:56 am #382338
Its just it keeps on popping on my head and I felt bad that what im thinking is sexualizing them. Okay, ill keep that in mind maybe ill be inactive and heal for the meantime. And also do I need to stop searching and searching because it will just worsen the situation?? Thankyou so much I just didnt know who to vent out this thoughts in my mind and I think its intrusive? I just wish that I didn’t read them and maybe I will have a peace of mind on admiring them
July 3, 2021 at 7:13 am #382341
- This reply was modified 2 months, 2 weeks ago by Grace.
You are very welcome. In regard to “I’m afraid I’m harming them”-
(1) Do you agree that what’s going on in your brain, your thoughts and feelings (such as in “sexualizing them”) does not harm the people you are a fan of? I mean, your thoughts and feelings do not exit your head and somehow walk or fly to the people you are a fan of and punch them, infect them?
(2) “do I need to stop searching and searching”- what exactly are you searching and searching?
(3) “I think its intrusive?”- do you suffer from intrusive thoughts/ OCD?
anitaJuly 3, 2021 at 7:16 am #382342
(1) I just feel horrible because all they do is entertain us with contents but my mind keeps on projecting images and disturbing thoughts like me want to be with them and its so disturbing just thinking about it is giving me chills.</p>
(2) im searching about do they/other fans also did what I do and felt bad for it some stuff like that like I need reassurance
(3) and yes I suffer from itJuly 3, 2021 at 7:42 am #382346
The title of this thread is “Am I a bad person?”- reads to me that you, Grace, are not a bad person but a person who suffers from OCD, like you said you do. Were you diagnosed with OCD and are you in any kind of treatment for it, medication perhaps?