August 22, 2021 at 10:29 am #385112
It may be worth it to look closer at what bullying means, and your ex being a bully, what it says about him. Wikipedia in its entry on Bullying, reads: “Bullying is a subcategory of aggressive behavior characterized by the following three criteria: (1) hostile intent, (2) imbalance of power, and (3) repetition over a period of time. Bullying is.. intended to hurt another individual, physically, mentally, or emotionally.. intentionally…
“Verbal bullying is one of the most common types of bullying… Verbal bullying includes any of the following: Derogatory name-calling and nicknaming.. Yelling at or talking to someone in a rude or unkind tone of voice… Mocking someone’s voice or style of speaking, Laughing at someone, Making insults or otherwise making fun of someone”.
It is clear to me that your ex has been a bully for as long as you shared about him, that he ENJOYS being aggressive to those he perceives to be weaker than him (feeling safe from retaliation!) If I was you, I would exclude him from my personal life for good, no going back!
August 24, 2021 at 1:05 pm #385251
- This reply was modified 1 month, 4 weeks ago by anita.
Definitely not going back. I am sitting outside the fenced in yard with hair dye in with a bag over my head hahaha. Hoping for new changes. I don’t know how to be single in my mind it’s like I am always looking for someone I could crush on. But I think being single for awhile could help me build immunity to bullies. I don’t know if it is being single that is hard for me or just not having a controlling personality in my life. Like my way best friend, then stp man, and then this ex. It’s like I need to somehow not give that much power away or become blind to it.
Here’s to new beginnings. How are you these days Anita? Hand feeling better?
ZeezaAugust 24, 2021 at 1:15 pm #385253
“Here’s to new beginnings“- I’ll drink for that! New Beginnings to include “immunity to bullies” as you put it!
May No More Bully Boyfriends (NMBB) go together with your new hair color and new beginnings!
I am fine, thank you. It is a beautiful day here, the sun is shining nicely, butterflies.. took a walk in nature, a beautiful day! And I am typing right now without the hand brace!
anitaAugust 25, 2021 at 8:04 am #385284
I see my ex at 3pm today so he can grab his stuff and I can have the rest of mangos stuff.
Not looking forward to it trying my best to not go backwards in my head he messaged me like we didn’t break up or go no contact for a week. He said he was sorry my dogs get bruised in his van but I don’t buy it mangos ears are bruised.
After we meet I will go back to my friends house. He was asking me to go camping or go for a walk and I said no. It didn’t work out we are rude to each other. I was rude to him last week when I said I feel like I am going to cry when I was at airport. And he just said aweeeeee all patronizing like so I said shut up and hung up. When I was crying when I first found mangos bruises and said to myself what do I do?? He said get in the fuc**ing shower. And I was like don’t talk down to me like that so yes it is over no going back just need to grab stuff.
I passed out early last night eating cake and watching judge Judy. Glad I didn’t have any break ups like that. Especially not being stuck in a lease with him.
I’m glad the sun is shining and your hand is doing better Anita. I look forward to imaging what life will be like free of crazy making behavior from boyfriend’s.
I do believe I am codependent. I don’t know how to just look for approval from myself and not look to others to shape my perspective it’s like I am so use to handing my power over.
ZeezaAugust 25, 2021 at 8:52 am #385285
I could break my lease and move in at my friends and put most stuff in storage unit. Until I figure out where I am moving or what is going on. They have plenty of room and a dog friend for Mango. Harry could hang it in th big laundry room for peace away from kiddos.
I just really don’t want to go back to my studio apartment that feels unsafe.August 25, 2021 at 10:08 am #385288
“when I said I feel like I am going to cry when I was at airport. And he just said aweeeeee all patronizing… When I was crying when I first found mangos bruises and said to myself what do I do?? He said get in the fuc**ing shower“- he is an ass**** and has proven himself as such over a long, long period of time.
“I look forward to imaging what life will be like free of crazy making behavior from boyfriend’s“- I know that it is difficult for you to be alone, I understand it. I just hope that you can see clearly that the company of an ass**** is worse than loneliness. (I don’t normally use that term*** but I can’t think of a more appropriate term at the moment).
“I’m glad the sun is shining and your hand is doing better Anita“- the sun is shining right now, not yet as beautifully as it did yesterday. My hand is still healing, thank you.
anitaSeptember 7, 2021 at 3:17 pm #385932
What’s happening Zeeza? It’s been almost 2 weeks since I heard from you last???
anitaSeptember 21, 2021 at 3:35 pm #386590
If you are not posting because you are back with the guy.. you know, the guy we both don’t appreciate much, that’s okay.. I still want to read from you. I will not accuse you of anything for going back. I just hope you are okay!!!
anitaOctober 13, 2021 at 8:18 pm #387335
I miss you Zeeza!