What is the best way to respond?

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    What happened last night
    My bf was out drinking after dinner, going back at 12 am a woman is outside his dorm room asleep drunk.
    He understand because the same thing happened to him mistaking getting on wrong floor.
    He felt uncomfortable to wake her up saying he’s not yelling to wake up a snoring woman and definitely not touching her as you know females accusing of sexual assault ”
    He just wanted to charge his phone for a bit before heading out off base. So just left by himself to a local bar which I reminded him if drinking at the base is not enough and he’s not with someone which is not a good idea. He’s already there at the bar and not responding to my message.

    Around 2am he called me telling his phone is dying. He seems cocky on videocall showing off his cigarette and lighter like a child. He asked me how am I feeling as I told him to go home and I need him to stay with me as I’m grieving our family dog just died that evening. I said I’m okay now , let’s talk about you. I said he’s not with someone and he has to be careful you don’t know what might happen when people are drunk. He said he’s not drunk and told me the place is like a club with female workers rather than just bar and women same nationality like me(which is a redflag). He said only bought one shot for a woman as it seems like she is too nauseous to take the shot. Then later on told me he already bought lots anyway (shot for women) I know he’s lying. No wonder he was asking on videocall how am I feeling because he is being sympathetic to other woman.
    Yet he told me don’t worry he is loyal and he loves me. I said yet you are there. I got angry and ended the call, he keeps calling back and I answer every time til his phone died 20 mins conversation.
    I was worried, emotionally tired and fell asleep 230am

    Woke up at 8am .
    Read his message telling me someone kicked him but its so weak even if he is drunk he almost got in trouble. 4am is the time he got home. He was calling that time but I’m deep asleep already.

    I have his fb and I checked on it, seeing he chatted his group chat at work what happened. He mentioned a snco kicked him when he hugged a woman who had just broke up (maybe its the guy who is the bf) then the owner came before things escalated. Saying the man should work on his quads as it was weak . The girls escorted him out. ( Never happened before getting attention from women and him saying that to appear women likes him )

    He is still asleep now. I don’t know what should I do when he wakes up. He doesn’t know that I saw his group chat.
    He was never out alone before. He even told me when he is with coworkers at a bar he feels alone seeing couples there and would rather wants us to go together. I think he knows someone at that bar because he would never go in a bar alone.
    What should I do ? I am confused why is he doing this now, I understand he feels lonely so am I… only 20days left before his next visit.. Why does this have to happen ?

    We’re in long distance relationship since 2019 and this month we’re meeting up again to file our marriage.


    Dear Fae

    Having read thru your thread a couple of times, do you mind if i ask you a couple of questions.

    How many times have you met  up with your bf in this 4 year long distant relationship and how long were these visits.

    How did you meet? Where are you planning to live once you are married and will it still be a long distant relationship?

    At the moment my only comment is that long distant relationships are hard to maintain and adding loneliness & alcohol into the mix is a recipe for trouble.

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