Dear Ahvoo:

This is my understanding following reading your post and please let me know if my understanding is correct:

You have no experience with a woman because of your severe shyness from which you suffered since childhood till the present, age 26.

You did not have physical intimacy with a woman for no other reason but that you are severely shy.

Being severely shy means that you are severely scared of being rejected by a woman. You cannot see yourself relaxing into the act of a kiss, let’s say. You can’t imagine yourself being relaxed enough to proceed with physical intimacy with a woman. You are just too scared.

Am I correct?

If I am, I have much more to say and share, as I was severely shy myself, and I mean, severely.

anita

Hi Ahvoo,

“I’m an introvert by nature and prefer to stay at home rather than go out and party or be social”

This I completely understand because I am an introvert to some extent as far not wanting to go out to a party/clubs/bars every chance I get. I’d rather be at home working on a project, yoga, outdoor farmers market, maybe go out to eat somewhere every now and then or catch a movie. Otherwise, I enjoy being at home working on something lite and creative, Whether that’s cooking, drawing or reading. I enjoy the peace I have at home with myself. So, therefore I understand you.

You’re not ugly and you’re not a loser just because you’re a virgin/shy/haven’t been kissed yet. Who ever told you these things is ugly and loser because they are insecure about themselves. That doesn’t define you. You deserve love and affection and to most definitely have a beautiful relationship & life with a woman that you love. Just take small steps when it comes to building a relationship with a woman, let it flow naturally and don’t automatically think that every woman you come in contact with, will reject you. Now, if you continue to keep yourself so closed and don’t allow yourself at least the chance, people will sense you’re closed off. So the next time you start liking a woman, just stay calm, smile and relax. Start a conversation about anything you know, she will enjoy talking about. The secret that you may or may not know, is that people enjoy it when you ask them questions about themselves, you know like the little things. And then refer back to yourself on how might relate to them. It can be about a certain place, ethnic background, school, job, restaurant. Just go with it and let yourself flow……<3 Don’t concentrate on how you might get nervous, or if you say the wrong thing. Just be at peace with yourself, knowing you mean well and are communicating by being your special self.

You will connect with a woman and have a special and loving bond with her, if you just give yourself the chance to allow yourself to flow with it. A special woman isn’t going to reject you, just because you’re a virgin and never kissed before. And when and if you do kiss a woman for the first time, just kiss each other lightly on the lips, you don’t need to put your tongue down each others throats for it to beautifully romantic. Just light pecks/kisses on the lips is already beautiful and romantic in itself already. A real woman who deeply loves you, will allow you to take as much time as you need when it comes to having sex for the first time. She will respect that when you are ready to make love to her, that you will decide and let her know when you feel comfortable to do so. Whether it takes months or even a year or so. Making love is something special you two will share privately together when you both are ready. By then you will have spent enough time with her to feel comfortable to do so.

You can’t speak for the entire population of women, thinking that nobody is going to find you attractive and that every single one of them will reject you because it’s surely not true. The right woman is out there for you but you have to be open to the idea, allow your heart to give love as well as receive love.

You are a beautiful soul and we are all equals here. You are no lesser than the rest of us, just because you’re a virgin and haven’t kissed yet. You have a lot to offer that special someone, just remember to relax and be confident in knowing that you are special just the way you are. Be at peace and love yourself, you deserve it and so does that special woman you decide to be with in the very near future. It will all be okay. Whenever you get nervous, remind yourself at that very moment to take a deep breath, relax, stay calm and just breathe…. Relax those nerves and you will be at peace. Just flow….<3

If you have anymore more questions please feel free to ask me or ask the forum, everybody is here to help and support you. 🙂

Sending you lots of love, positivity and light your way.

M.