Dear Daniel C.:

You agree with me, that anxiety freezes your brain so it is less capable of learning. The less anxiety, the smarter (and wiser) you will be. I hope your parents understand this concept and they pay for psychotherapy for you with a competent, caring therapist for a few months at the least.

It can be therapy of you seeing the therapist individually, learning skills how to manage your emotions on one hand and on the other gain insight about how your relationships with your parents in the past and presently (as well as the relationship between your parents) caused or contribute/d to your anxiety.

And at any one time, it may be you and your parents attending therapy sessions together. This is called “psychoeducation” where the therapist teaches you and your parents how to interact with each other (with EAR: Empathy, Assertiveness and Respect), interacting in the sessions with the help of the therapist.

In any case, what you tell the therapist in one-to-one sessions is confidential: the therapist by law is not allowed to share what you tell him/ her with your parents or anyone else without your written consent.

In summary: to get better grades in 11th grade, 12 grade and college and to become a mechanical engineer, the most helpful thing for you is to get psychotherapy with a competent, caring therapist so to eliminate the anxiety as much as possible. This will be the wisest investment you and your parents can make for you.

anita