Dear XenopusTex:

You mentioned the lunch date made an apparent mistake with the choice of the husband she is now divorcing. We all make mistakes and keep making mistakes. Best we can is minimize the chances of future mistakes by being aware and prevent them. Better prevent than waste all that time after the fact. You made the mistake of letting your mother move in with you and look at the consequences…? So lean toward forgiving others for making mistakes as well as forgiving yourself.

As far as separating from your mother: why not have her move out? If it is legally doable, why not do that? Stand up to her. Have her move out. There is the possibility of you moving out- sad to me. I prefer her moving out because it is YOUR home. And she said it was temporary. So she should move out.

But separation either way is a good idea. And don’t repeat that mistake- no more family members in your home please.

When you get emails about other people being stressed at work while work is being piled up on your plate, tell them so, tell them to deal with their stress better because there is only so much work you should do. You area human too!

The lunch date woman- she was so enthusiastic seeing you, I am thinking she may think you are not interested. This is why I recommended you contact her, to let her know (how busy you have been and) that you are interested.

anita