Dear Shaun:

Welcome back.

Before reading your new thread I read your posts on the April thread. From that thread, it is obvious that your wife has been indeed verbally abusive. Unfortunately you mentioned there that she yelled at your daughter as well. This is very unfortunate for your daughter. It is also evident from your previous thread that your wife is not well emotionally and hasn’t been well for a while.

Regarding your post above, you wrote: ” I know that my wife can change back to the loving, kind, gracious person she once was if she chooses”-

I don’t think so. I don’t think she can make a simple choice to be “loving, kind, gracious” – I think she has serious issues that need attending to in competent psychotherapy.

Regarding ” I will initiate the mediation while pursuing her in love. I will show her love and compassion no matter the outcome” I think that pursuing her love since April did not work for you- or for her- and time to let go of this aim.

If your latest post is about Accepting and Letting Go- then let go of pursuing her love. You learned that ” I found that she is extremely manipulative and verbally abusive”- then don’t pursue the love of an extremely manipulative and verbally abusive woman. It is unwise.

Congratulations for learning and resolving to let go- through your old thread and this one I see positive progress in you asserting yourself and moving away from doing anything and everything to appease her. More work to be done, is my input: integrate what you learn about her into your future behavior all the way.

anita