Can’t is an interesting choice of words. Unless you are dead, or similarly impaired, can’t probably isn’t a viable option in terms of dating.

While I haven’t done 40 dates, feel your pain. Usually don’t get to a third date. Financially and employment sound, I just don’t flash it around. I prefer long term planning to instant gratification, so my stuff isn’t really flashy.

I have a melancholic personality which probably doesn’t help.

Think about how you approach things and how you wind up looking.