Dear Summerain:

Of the things you listed, I like: “He is respectful of me and he remains level headed even when we fight and is careful not say hurtful things to me even when we argue” the most (although I don’t like that you fight).

I think he has a point when he told you that ” he has done everything he can but I am still unhappy.” You feel uncomfortable requesting him to come to bed, for example. You want him to stop playing computer games and come to bed on his own, without you telling him. But it is not reasonable on your part to expect that because he cannot read your mind (and shouldn’t try). He can’t tell that you are thinking: “It is now time for him to stop playing.”

And he may be carried away with the game and needs your help to stop playing. So give him that help..?

When you requested that he texts you twice a day or so, you expected him to remember and continue to do what you requested without fail forever. But he doesn’t like texting and is not in the habit of texting. So he tried hard and managed to text you twice a day or so for two weeks. Then he went back to his old habit. Habits are hard to change. Be patient with him.

anita