Dear Danielle:

The key sentence in your last post is: “my OCD is latching on to it”-

Your OCD is a big part of how your brain operates, and so it will latch on to this for as long as it does, and if it stops, it will be because something bigger happens and so it will latch to that thing. Sometimes, your OCD brain will take a break, and you think: what a relief, it is over. But that is temporary.

The hope is in this fact: not ALL your brain is OCD. There is a place in your brain for you to relocate to, so to speak. There is a calm place in your brain you don’t know about because you are thrown around in the storms of your OCD brain.

OCD is part of you, as it is, but it is not ALL of you.

Find that calm place and the more often you can go there, and from there OBSERVE the other, distressed OCD part, the more in control you will be.

There is nothing I can write to convince your OCD brain that what he did was forgivable (he did nothing wrong when a girl kissed him without his permission or pre-knowledge)- you can’t argue with OCD and talk it into logic. This is because OCD is fueled by anxiety, fear, not logic.

You can come out from this “horrible cycle”- it is just not easy, but oh, so very possible.

anita