Dear Cloud:

Your thinking is very clear then- it is not clouded. Your positions and motivations are clear and consistent as they are stated in your last post. There was a conflict before, I understood: you wanted to explore a possible romantic relationship with her by traveling and meeting her in person (through extended friendship first, this is clear) and on the other hand, you wanted to let go of your feelings for her before traveling.

Now it reads to me like there is no conflict: knowing yourself, you know that you will not be able to let go of your feelings for her before exploring the possibility of a romantic relationship in the future, a possibility that she articulated to you.

And so, are you abandoning the objective of letting go of your feelings for her (stated in the title of your thread)? This may be the new attitude- not aiming at letting go of your feelings for her- that will make it possible for you to relax and live in the here-and-now. When one doesn’t fight one’s feelings, they tend to lose their intense hold on a person, no longer being a preoccupation.

As I understand it then, your plan is to not pursue romantic relationships (through friendship first) with another woman before you travel to see her next fall, and explore the possibility of a romantic relationship with her. Am I correct?

anita