Dear Littlered:

You are very welcome.

You wrote: “it is not what they did or said but how I am continuing to let it inside me and trigger me”- I believe it is both: it is about what the man said and it is about it triggering the I-am-not-worthy core belief. The words were offensive- your reaction is understandable. The intensity of the reaction over five years is about the core belief being there, breathing life into these words.

In my experience, it takes a whole lot of patience with the process of changing this kind of core beliefs. You are definitely on the path of changing yours. Yes, I remember you  liking the CBT concept and exercises. To put it very simply, the thought in the core belief that you are not worthy is incorrect. Corrected belief/ thought: you are worthy.

Now, if only it was that simple to change a core belief!

anita