Thanks to Anita, Hana L and Peter for replying.

I appreciate it.

i suppose the best way to explain it is I feel like there are two people who are totally different and really not the same person. The person I was when I was a teenager and younger who experienced the problems I mentioned above, and the person I have been for the past 5 years or so who was confident, had decent success and was good at something. I don’t know why it hit me all of a sudden, but I just tried to judge myself on the whole picture and that lead to all this doubt. But I guess I just have to accept what it is.

thanks to everyone again.

best regards.