Hi Eliana,

I appreciate your response.  I have experienced many of the same issues on trying to measure up.  I expected this and when done appropriately I appreciated that she had a good relationship with her husband.  However, several times her comments were just plain mean.  I was willing to work with this, knew that she was still hurting and that recovery is not ending for her.

However with time her idolization became even greater.  I think the threat of us having a long and meaningful relationship challenged her and pushed boundaries.  I really feel for her but also had to take care of myself thus having to walk away.  Because I truly cared for her, and although probably too early loved her, I feel horrible.  I was willing to work with her on this but after months of intensity it appears her flame died out for me.  She is solely in love with her deceased husband.

I recognize your experience is greater than mine but will not write off all widows.  I just need to be more aware of the warning signs before I commit.  Thank you for your insight.

With much sadness for all,

Chris