Hello! My parents divorced when I was a baby and my step-mom has been in my life since I was 3-years-old (I’m now 28). Being a step-mom and co-parenting is no easy feat, and I think it’s completely normal to have mixed feelings. On one hand you love your boyfriend and appreciate the beautiful relationship he has with his son, but on the other hand maybe it feels like you’ve suddenly “skipped steps” in your life? All of a sudden there’s a child who has to be considered at all times (and his biological mother, as well).

Be kind to yourself- you’re not a terrible person for having these feelings. I can only speak for myself, but I would start to take note of what I’m feeling on a regular basis. What are the pros of dating someone with a child? What are the cons? What do you value? For example: Do you value intimate relationships, family, work, hobbies (traveling, playing sports, etc…)- and what order would you potentially place these in?

There is no right or wrong answer and I know it may seem overwhelming, but I think the ultimate goal is to find peace and contentment. Taking note of how you’re feeling over a period of time and on a consistent basis and being mindful of this may help you.