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Reply To: daily letter of mina

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#171473
Mina
Participant

[Oct 4, 2017]

This will be the last letter that I posted here. I wanna thank every single silent readers or anyone who has commented in my thread here in Tiny Buddha. Especially to Anita.

Gyunnie is also thanking everyone here who has been very supportive of me and him.

I will be posting my last conversation of me and Gyunnie here :

Mina : Happy Thanksgiving. I hope you have a happy one.

Gyunnie : Yes, you too. Have a fun thanksgiving day!!

Mina : Thank you … I hope you do not mind me asking but did you get accepted into Y university?

Gyunnie : Yes I did! I got accepted, that is why I am currently not attending K university this semester hahaha

Mina : Wow!! Congratulations. I am so happy for you. After all those struggles, you really deserve it. My sincerest congratulations for you once again.

Gyunnie : Hahahaha thank you … really thank you so much. I hope your university life goes well as well!

Mina : Yes, yes! Are you currently living in Daegu (another city in Korea, about 3 hours from Seoul) because Peter (the name of the guy that introduced us) keeps asking me about why he have not seen you around in the dorm?

Gyunnie : Hahahahha, yeah that is right.

Mina : I really hope you do not mind me asking you these questions, sorry if you mind!

Gyunnie : No no, you can ask. It is okay

Mina : Thank you … the truth is I was worried about you a lot, but hearing you sounding fine makes me feel happy 🙂 sorry that it sounds so random

Gyunnie : Do not worry about me. I am really doing well. I just have something stuck inside me because I still do not know the right manner to date. I did not know that you were worried about me … and since I am really fine right now, do not worry about me and take care of yourself.

Mina : No, I also have a lot of regrets. I never got to say “thank you” to you and I feel like I was not a good partner for you as well. I could not help you or support you much during your hard times. You were a good boyfriend to me, regardless of anything that had happened. I wanted to say that to you, just once.

Gyunnie : Really …. thank you.

Mina : Sorry that it sounds out of the blue. I wanted to say those things for a very long time but I feel like I was not ready… even though it is very late, thank you for listening to every single things of what I needed to say. Thank you.

Gyunnie : Really …  thank you so much, stay well

Mina : You too … be well and be happy .. goodbye

Gyunnie stopped replying after that.

I cried. Obviously. It was really hard  since his message was very clear to me.

We are done, it is the harsh reality that I refused to acknowledged until today but he reminded me once again.

Being the honest and straight forward person that he is, he wants me to move on.

I know that.

My heart is shattered, I am feeling a lot of rough emotions from talking to Gyunnie.

I spent 3 months talking here as you guys were him that when I talked to the real person, it did not felt real,

Until he said a lot of things that was just … so him. So honest. Full of sincerity that he wished me well, but our relationship cannot continue any longer in the future as well.

I felt relieved that I finally got to say what I had wrote here to him directly, even though all he can say was “thank you”

My heart feels very heavy everyone.

-Mina