Dear Louise:

Reads to me that what you miss is not a man who truly loved you but a man whose style of dating was this: “he didn’t  want  to wait… he wanted a life long partner… told me with each  day we  spent together he was  falling for  me  more  and  more. He would run his fingers through my hair…He would  travel 40 miles  to come to see me for 45 min lunched… He bought a toothbrush which he said meant our relationship was  moving  to the next stage and that I was the one, his soul mate…”

You thought, understandably, that his grand statements and actions meant that he loved you intensely. I think reality, his grand statements and actions were his style of dating a woman. Not a grand love story for you individually, but … a style.

“The night before the split we stayed up… ate ice cream, spoke about us and our future again, he even said about us living together…and the  next day.. he  sent  a text saying: ‘I don’t normally do this but this is goodbye..’ and later: ‘Thank you please take care of yourself'”

And that  was  his style of ending a relationship.

If he was authentic while dating you, if he really  felt deeply for you (and so quickly), then he  couldn’t  have ended it with you so abruptly and completely, the day after insisting that living together was  what he  wanted.

anita