I used to stick up for myself in the first few years of the relationship. I would always tell him when his joking or sarcasm went too far. But maybe it just wasn’t enough? I thought I was getting through to him, but as the years went on things got worse and then the name calling began. He also began to get angry at very random things I would say or do in everyday situations, and I just don’t understand why? Like he was attacking my personality. I struggle with feeling like a lot of this is my fault and like I’ve enabled him, and if I would have been able to handle things correctly or had done things differently then they wouldn’t be so bad. I feel bad for making him angry and upset,  I’m not a confrontational person, arguments are always very difficult for me. I think I may also be co-dependent and I know that I need to continue going to therapy to work on that. I do feel like a lot of the time his need to have control over things has taken over, he’s always been a bit of a control freak but as he gets older it gets worse. I do feel like no matter what I do, it’s never good enough for him. I don’t know if he will ever change his ways, when I try and talk to him about it, he just doesn’t seem to get it, he doesn’t seem to be able to put himself in my shoes and see how I feel. I’m a very giving person and I like to make others happy, but I honestly feel like he’s taken advantage of it.

• This reply was modified 6 years ago by Perla.