Thank you Valora,

When we had our last conversation (during the time I went to drop something off and wish him well), we talked and I asked him if I did something to turn him off. He told me that I didn’t and that it actually had nothing to do with me (like what you said). He told me that I was sweet, kind, generous, smart, attractive – but that it was just how he was dealing with everything. Maybe I did overestimate his ability to be available and commit. As someone who’s never even had a serious relationship, I just thought it was a matter of interest: if there’s a connection/interest, you pursue it. If not, then you drop it.  That’s why it was so confusing because I know there was an interest. I also thought a year was enough time and that he was dating, it showed he was ready.

I really appreciate you taking the time to share how you felt and what you went through. Maybe he does feel something similar and is afraid (which fits) – I don’t know. All I do know is that things were going well and then he dropped off because he said he isn’t ready – which was confusing because he seemed very interested.

Maybe a year isn’t enough time for him or maybe he just wants to enjoy his freedom without anyone for a while. Either way, I don’t want to freak him out – I really liked him and enjoyed the time I spent with him. So I’ll just give him the space he wanted and try to let him go completely. I hope his work trip allows him to take some time to sort things out. If he comes back to me, then I’ll have my answer I guess. In the meantime, I can just focus on me and maybe just take a break from dating myself for a little while.

Thank you again,

-Aila