Dear FordPrefect:

You wrote about this man that you recently met: “a wonderful, kind and caring man… the kindest, most affectionate, warm and lovely man I’ve ever met. Goodness just shines out of him… how wholesome, beautiful, educated, responsible and just lovely he is”.

My input: he is not that wonderful, kind, and good. I’ll take your word for it, that he is wonderful, kind, affectionate, warm, lovely, good, wholesome, beautiful, educated and responsible, but he is far from being perfectly all those things. Sometimes he has unkind thoughts and feelings, no doubt. Sometimes he is not affectionate, no doubt. And sometimes he behaves not in a perfectly wholesome ways. There are things he is not educated about as well.

“it makes me feel like i’m tainting him with the darkness and baggage i’ve picked up along the way”-

Get to know him better and you will see his faults. That will close the gap that exists in your mind between how great he is and how not so great you are in comparison. In other words, he is not Light and you are not Darkness.

Get to know his darkness, not only his light. As you see him more and more as a human, not as a god, you will feel more and more comfortable with him.

anita