Dear kiwiboy0897:

I think that I understand: by “Steve has been completely cut off”, it was not that he was completely cut off, but any and all communication beyond the minimal friendly interactions within the gym were cut off. It makes sense that because your partner does not own the gym, he doesn’t have any possible way to ban Steve from the gym, and it makes sense that for as long as the two of them attend the gym, they should to be minimally friendly, so that it is not awkward and doesn’t disturb the positive atmosphere required in a gym.

So by “Steve.. no longer come to the gym”- it was not that he was asked not to return to the gym, or that he said that he will not, but it just happens that he didn’t show up for two weeks.

Reads to me that you love your partner very much and that he loves you back. I suggest that you keep the honest communication with him going, and when you feel anxious, insecure, don’t always express it, so to not burden him with your anxiety again and again. Share it with him at times, in moderation.

Also, present your anxiety, worries, etc., in a responsible way, that is, not in a whiny way or a desperate way, but in a confident way, for example, telling him in a confident voice: I love you so much, sometimes I’m afraid to lose you. And don’t interrogate him as if he was a suspect either. (It is not that I think you have done these things, I am suggesting these things just in case they are or will become applicable).

One more thing: when worried, look for the facts, restate reality, instead of being carried away with your imagination- don’t be carried away by Fiction, stick to the True-story, the facts. And post again anytime you want to.

anita