I think its natural to be scared and anxious about the path forward when one is rethinking what to do in life. Please don’t label yourself or your thoughts so negatively. First of all, IT helps people indirectly. Entertainment helps people indirectly also. How many times have we gone to a show, a concert, a movie and come out feeling happier, refreshed, and had fun? What I am going to suggest is that you google “career aptitude tests” and try to take one, even if you have to pay for it. This kind of testing will tell you what kind of work you might be good at, what your strengths are, and many are empirically validated (meaning they have research behind them showing they are accurate). You are young and you have time to decide what you want to do in life. I have read that Indigo Adults often have a hard time at sticking to a career because they learn it fast and it feels “old” and “boring” quickly and they need to feel fulfilled in life. You don’t say what you would do in entertainment, whether you sing, can run a camera, dance, whatever. The odds of making it big are slim but the odds of finding a good job in entertainment, say as a dancer in Las Vegas or other casino towns is better. Those people are strong, talented, and need to be in excellent shape physically. I know that many entertainment jobs are scarce right now in the pandemic. I am going to suggest you volunteer to work in an animal shelter right now while you work this part time retail job. If you are in college, work on your first two years of basic classes. You’ll need them no matter what and this education will serve you a life time. I would also suggest you start to journal on paper with pen all your thoughts each evening. Write how you feel and then write 3-5 things you are grateful for. Make a list of jobs you might want to do. Just list them out. Don’t censor yourself. Then take each job and list why you are interested in it. Much like you have written on here. Then write down what education or skills one needs for that job. Then circle the skills or education you have that fits this job. For retail job you have customer service skills already so if you wanted to be a salesperson, you would circle this skill in the list of skills and education, for example. If you don’t know what skills or education you might need for any job, google on indeed or your government’s online job listing board for that job and read several job postings. Find the job requirements from these job postings. This will help you clarify your thinking. Good luck to you.

EDIT: If you are interested in IT, there is a type of IT that does assistive technology or access technology and this means it is the programming into websites and documents that enables people who use a screen reader program to be able to access that website without problems. This is a good field, a booming field, because in the USA, the ADA mandates equal access. You would need a college degree. And it truly helps those who can’t see or are paralyzed or use a screen reader for any reason, stroke, whatever, to be able to have the website read properly by their computer. You would not believe how many websites are not accessible.