Dear Shay,

I would like to thank you wholeheartedly for having the courage to share your pain here. I’m glad you feel this is a safe space for you to do so 🙂 Reading your words, there is so much positive light in the midst of your struggle.

The most important thing is you are SO aware! Being aware of one’s situation is half the battle. Sadly, there are millions of people out there in the world suffering from childhood & family trauma just like yours. You are not alone. However, many of us are simply not aware of this and become angry as we try to figure out what’s going on. You clearly understand what’s going on in your life and the reasons why. You come across as intelligent, articulate, brave, soulful and wise. These are qualities that are obviously in you and will always be there – use them!

Maybe this is time to have a conversation with YOU. Take your relationship completely off the table. Make it irrelevant for a while and make the focus of your healing solely about you. Ask yourself some powerful questions. Here’s some to get you started:

* What’s going on with me?
* If my relationship didn’t exist, what would my life look like?
* What would I be experiencing?
* What’s possible for me?
* What can’t I do right now?
* Why can’t I do this?
* What’s in the way?
* What do I need to get by?
* What’s my ideal life look like?
* What’s missing right now?
* What am I frightened of?
* What’s true about this fear?
* How do I know what’s true?
* What’s the best that can happen?

Hopefully some of these may get you thinking a little differently and kick-start your movement into another direction.

You are a wonderful woman, Shay. Appreciate what you have, what you are capable of and what’s possible for you. It’s a whole lot more than you possibly think right now.

I wish you love, peace and wellness. You deserve it!

Matt.