Oh Leina… you poor thing… do not be so hard on yourself… and believe me … when I say this to you I am saying it to myself. I just can’t believe that someone else is feeling EXACTLY the same as I do and saying exactly the same thing as I am saying to myself day after day…………it is so so difficult.. but it all comes down to the thoughts we are believing about ourselves and the situation.. I would really like to tell you about something I discovered a while ago which really really helps. It is called ‘The Work’ and it was discovered by a woman called Byron Katie. She has written a few books and I have 2. One is called ‘I need your love… is that true?’ and the other ‘loving what is’.
How it works is this. When we are down, stressed, broken hearted.. etc.. she suggests we identify the thoughts we are believing about the situation and then ask 4 questions.. 1. eg. I need him to love me to make me happy and feel like a worthwhile human being… (sound familiar?) OK so the first question is… Is this true? and you answer honestly … question 2… Do I absolutely know this is true?….. question 3. How do I feel when I believe this thought?…list every emotion, feeling etc. question 4.. Who/how would I be if it was impossible for me to believe this thought… interesting one this.. because you have to use your imagination to really feel how you would feel if it was in fact impossible for you to believe this…
If you like the sound of this please visit her website… thework.com. and it may explain it better. you can also print off worksheets for free.. give it a shot.. it WILL help. and let me know what you think!!
And don’t worry.. I know 6 months sounds like a long time but today was what I call a blip day. I have had many more good days than bad since we broke up…and each time I know I am stronger and closer to letting go completely. There IS hope Leina… (and by the way.. you sound quite young.. I am a 46 year old single mother which makes it alot more difficult!! so if I can do it… so can you 🙂