Dear Palegazesunnidays:

You are welcome!  “I’ve been finding myself snapping at my boys in on occasions in recent months. I feel frustrated and perhaps angry… I’ve not felt as low, muddled, confused, snappy etc. before as much as I do now and over recent months.. in the last few weeks it’s kind of hit a peak and I’m teetering on sinking, and clinging on to make changes.“-  your anger is trying to deliver a message to you, and it’s trying to deliver it loud and clear.

“Feeling held back. Guilty for wanting to go and do things on my own.. Frustrated and angry – with my parents, within all my relationships.. the need to escape and feel free and the guilt“- the anger’s message, as I hear it: Palegazesunnidays needs to live her own life, for herself; not for her parents, not for a partner, not even for her (teenage) kids!

When is Palegazesunnidays’s turn, when is she going to have her own .. sunny days?

“Guilt that if I did some of the things I wanted… I would hurt them, hurt their feelings“- if you don’t do some of the things you want to do, you will hurt those who do love you.

“I am a good person and good people don’t hurt others, don’t leave, don’t walk away“- you are indeed a good person, so please: don’t keep leaving you, don’t keep walking away from you.

“When I left home to move in with my husband, my parents were always popping round… I remember when the relationship with my partner ended, he said ‘your ex (husband) warned me they (my parents) don’t leave you alone’“- your person, your life, is not your parents’ property. They shouldn’t get to decide what to do with you for the rest of your life, or theirs.

“I bumped into A whilst shopping today. He apologised…  ‘I’ll try to make some time for you’. I felt angry, and saw it for what it is“- what it is, as I see it is a man trying to get his needs met.

I wonder if now is the right time to get quality counseling, so to help you at this time of increased self-awareness and challenge?

anita