I agree with Gavin. In order to really love someone, you must first love yourself. Easier said than done I know. I’m still working on that one. I find myself identifying with my girlfriend. I constantly have to take a step back and detach. I read some really good internet articles on love and detachment. Basically, in order to love someone unconditionally you must remove the caring. Yes, that sounds kind of counter-intuitive, but it works. Don’t care what they do, what they say, how you act around them, etc. Just be your authentic self see the value in yourself and in those things you love. Love comes from within, acceptance comes from within, happiness comes from within.

A good exercise that I’ve done is the following….
If _______ would only _______, then I could feel _______.

For each person who causes you angst write this line. Once you have written every thing down then make a line through the words until you get to the “I”. So you are left with “I could feel ________.” Because ultimately, you could feel anything you want to feel, you just have to let yourself feel it.

Good luck to you!