Jen,

Sojourner already said what came to heart for me, too. He has closed the door, made it clear that he needs space, and you’re still pressing onto his side, obsessing. Said differently, he isn’t the love of your life, dear sister, that love is inside you. Consider reading up on “the stages of grief”, which might help you process some of the emotions.

Sorry I don’t have better news, sis. Make sure to take lots of time to give yourself tender attention, making the space to let go of the old dreams with him and dream a new path for yourself. Consider giving soj’s post a few rereads, and try. Hugs to you, sis.

With warmth,
Matt