Well re-read what you wrote and you will know why you should leave. The question is, how? Simple. No contact with him whatsoever and cut it for good. Why should his choices be a reflection on your worth as a person? You have to live your life for your sake and dont let one relationship gone wrong make you question every single thing about you – there is way more to you than this relationship gone wrong despite the years and efforts. Its time you start reconnecting with those parts again Jenny and the way will create itself.