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Reply To: Life has passed me by

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#69241
Rock Banana
Participant

Again, seriously look into mindfulness meditation, it has helped me no end. It’s the practice that can help you implement what I’ve been discussing.

You probably won’t agree with this at first, but you don’t need fixing. Here’s a concept for you to consider: You are a perfect system. Your system is perfectly set up to get the results you’re getting out of life. The problem isn’t that you’re “broken”, it’s that your system is set up to get certain results, but not the ones you want. If you want to change the results, you have to change the system. Notice: not fix, just change. You are already enough now. You are already working and functional – you are very successful right now at getting the results you’re getting. Does that make sense? The problem, as I say, is that you want to change the results. You want to become successful at different results and you want to start getting really bad at thinking about the past all the time – you want to get good at being present focused and in the future and focusing on what it is you want to create into your life. If that idea makes sense to you, then the reason it’s so significant is because it will change your approach to solving these issues.

At the moment there seems to be a bit of a victim mindset, where there’s stuff happening and you reacting to it. Bills come in, you react. Opportunities come in, you react. Instead if you switch your focus to creation, then the possibility for you to live from a more empowered stance emerges. Here’s an idea for you: You don’t receive opportunities, YOU CREATE OPPORTUNITIES. See yourself as the creator of your own life, you create opportunities for yourself to do what it is you want to do in life and to live life how it is you want to live it. That’s something you yourself proactively create into the world, and you don’t wait to be given opportunities, you go ahead and make stuff happen. Notice your phrase: creative engagement in life. Well, that’s an aspect of creative engagement, isn’t it?

And might say it’s your “dumb brain” causing all this, but firstly your brain isn’t dumb it’s just learned to habitually use thinking in a certain way (remember, that’s the old system that you set up – consciously or not!) and also, the fact you’ve called it that shows that you’ve already dissociated from the negative thought patterns, and you seem to associate in your post with what you want to create (joy, meaning, self esteem, loving relationships and creative engagement) so you’re on the right track.

Let’s look at the positive: you have great insights into what it is you want to create, you have dissociated from the negative thoughts, you are already beginning to associate with the positive realities more and more now.

And for the fourth time: I recommend taking up mindfulness meditation.