Somethingsarah,

Thank you so much for reaching out.

To answer your question, he broke up with me in the worst way. For the last month of our relationship, he was acting so weird. Any time I tried to confront him, he would come up with some lame excuse like “be nicer to me and stop farting!” So the last time I tried to have a serious discussion with him, I happened to be at work and we were texting.

He was just acting so strange! I had to talk to him, so I think the conversation just happened that way. The conversation turned to him saying things like “I don’t think I could ever be happy or have a normal family because of the abortion. Have such hated towards what you’ve done. I don’t think I could ever be happy in a family situation or want children. We talk about fixing our relationship but there’s simply nothing to fix.”

He has always taken the abortion as something that I did as a really selfish means to better myself at the expense of our baby. He took it really personally and always accused me of “not wanting to have his baby” instead of the truth which was, if I’m not 100% ready and if it’s not something I want with all of my heart, then I’m not going to have a child in vain. I’m not going to have a child for the sake of having one. This was argue issue in our relationship in itself because he never wanted to discuss it with me, he didn’t want to go to therapy with me – or even sit in on a session. He just wanted to blame me and take no responsibility for what happened. He told all of his family (including his 16 year old sister), his friends, his coworkers, his boss. And mind you, we were living hours apart at the time because I had to move away for an internship opportunity that I could not pass up (I was fresh out of college). So I was all alone, with not even my family for support.

Anyway, so he wouldn’t answer his phone once I paniced and tried to reach him, and once I got ahold of him he confirmed that that’s what he really wanted. The conversation was mostly me being confused and him being silent. And after the initial break up, all of these other reasons came out – he really took it as an opportunity to really let out all of his frustrations with me. All of a sudden, my attitude was a contributing factor, my weight and attractiveness was a factor, the fact that we weren’t having fun (even though he JUST moved to my city to be with me be I ended up getting that dream job), he was mad because I talked about my job and new friends too much (even though I scored my dream job fresh out of my 4 year art s hook program and overcame many obstacles to get there – even though it was once of my life’s greatest accomplishments), he was mad because I tried too hard to “control things” because I wanted to wAit until I was ready and things were perfect to live together, get married, and have babies, the fact that’s had tried breaking up with him in the past because I wanted my space and I wanted to do me, and for the simple fact that I didn’t make him happy anymore… For all of this and probably more – he considers me incredibky selfish. Throughout our whole relationship he constantly threw it in my face that I was selfish (when I believed it to be putting myself first). Anything that could be wrong was wrong.

When I saw him in person and cried to him, when I was having my lowest moments, when my wounds were so freshly opened and I practically begged for him back – he laughed at me like I was an adorable child and told me that I was being so silly and ridiculous because he wasn’t dying and that there was all this hope for the future, given I change. And he was being gross, just stroking my face and making such joke out of my sadness…