Hi Matt,

Thank you for your consideration, measured words, and reasoned opinion.

I will endeavour to do the things you say, to reassess, reframe, and otherwise question my conclusion regarding what happened.

However, I have to admit that the vindictive nature of the act, while beyond question, is somewhat hard to reconcile with the person I knew, and so a little bit at odds with my own (well, current) conclusions on the matter.

The person I knew in our life together was funny, kind, gentle and sweet. She of course had her faults, but they were greatly outweighed by her positive attributes and the spiteful side of her only appeared rarely…generally when she perceived our bond was in jeopardy, whether that was from an outside source, or more typically when my attention was focussed on a family member.

My general view of her, makes it rather difficult for me to feel negatively towards her. I rather feel, that just like me, there was a moment in time where she lost herself. Where she wasn’t thinking clearly and she made a mistake, a fatal one as it happens, one that there’s no coming back from, but a mistake nonetheless.

I have done good in my life and I have done bad. I hope that when I am assessed by others that the positive outweighs the negative and that I’m not judged by my worst acts solely. That also means that I can’t judge Chris on the basis of one act solely. I have to give her the benefit of the doubt. That one act was uncharacteristic for her, and if her right minded self could have observed it, I’m sure she would have had a hard time understanding how she could do such a thing.

I don’t want you to think I’m brushing your advice to one side. I’ll certainly meditate on the subject and try to reconcile your interpretation with my own, but in being upfront about my feelings, I have to communicate and be forthright about the slight disconnect there is at this particular point in time.

Regardless of that disconnect, I greatly appreciate your council on the subject and am thankful that you were here to dispense your perspective on the subject!

Kaz