A couple months ago, I had posted my problems with a guy I liked, trying to develop friendships. I wanted to do an update.
I learned the major reason why I coukdn’t communicate well with people, that it wasn’t entirely my fault, I was just born with a brain that doesn’t process thought the same way the majority does. Finding out I have high function autism was a huge blow to me. At first, it led me to depressed state.
Then I used my discovery to better communicate with others. I have learned to go past my terrible communicatinv habits. Slowly I felt better.
Life has never been so much freer, I have realized after I fell out of love with my crush and made a few friends, that I love being alone. I do not feel the need to be in a relationship. love, after all, comes in different forms. I am glad I have made friends but they indirectly helped me understand that having alone time is very valuable to me. I have to sork hard to communicate with people and I have to have breaks.
I learned being alone doesn’t have to be lonely. I enjoy my own company now and I love the feeling that I am enough. That I am complete, that I can fill my own holes.
I would like to thank everyone for their advice and support from this site! In the end, you guys get it and are right with your words of wisdom!