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November 5, 2017 at 10:48 am #176569LouiseParticipant
I am so in Love with this man. I realise we both have our faults and there is work to do. But I don’t know how I’m going to be without him now! He was my best friend and I adore him. I can’t imagine ever loving another man as much as I love him now. I don’t know what to do, my body aches without him, I can’t take the thought of never seeing him again. I can’t believe I’ve lost him and I hate the way I handled things, I know ‘this can never be fixed and I’m finding that extremely hard to come to terms with. I’m in so much pain, everyday hurts and it’s not getting easier.
November 5, 2017 at 7:08 am #176547LouiseParticipantI don’t know, maybe he has? I just feel like I could have handled things a lot differently and that’s where the regret from my part comes from. Anita is right.. I did project past insecuritys on to him when he never gave me any reason to doubt him. He was a good man and treated me with respect and care apart from the episodes in which I triggered him. I did not do this intentionally and have learned my lesson from this. I feel guilt for doing that to him and causing him to loose his compure completely and turn into someone he is not. He hates himself for reacting like that and feels as if he cannot be around me now as he doesn’t want to be that way .
November 5, 2017 at 5:47 am #176539LouiseParticipantI am not trying to share his behaviour to encourage people to call him abusive. I know this man and deep down he is a good guy, and I do agree that I provoked him and I have already expressed my regret in doing so. I did not do this in a malicious or abusive way, I just was completely shocked my his reaction.
November 5, 2017 at 5:36 am #176535LouiseParticipantAnita I feel like all couples argue, and everyone in the world can get angry with their partner unless you are a saint! I would not class that as subtle abuse.
I feel like you should be able to express yourself to your partner without them blowing up in your face. It sounds to me you are suggesting not saying anything when you have an issue in case it causes him to become abusivei do not find your advice very helpful to be honest, that’s my opinion.
- This reply was modified 7 years ago by Louise.
November 5, 2017 at 2:48 am #176521LouiseParticipantThankyou for your replys. I have gone through a period of complete self blame. I know I triggered him and caused him to react this way, I know he is a good man deep down as I have seen it, although I’ve heard this is an act and it’s how these men hook you. I feel very traumatised and unsure of anything right now. He told me I’m crazy, a physco and paranoid all in one sentence, but he’s actually right!! I don’t feel normal right now?
November 4, 2017 at 3:07 pm #176497LouiseParticipantIt wasn’t without learning who he is, I was with him for a year
November 4, 2017 at 8:49 am #176477LouiseParticipantLove means making an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person.
November 4, 2017 at 8:29 am #176473LouiseParticipantThankyou for your reply. Yes I understand what you mean but that is not how a relationship works. You forgive and you understand your partner. I guess I will regret that day for the rest of my life because I have now lost the man I love and the man I want to spend my life with. I love him with every part of me and I can’t imagine the day I won’t. I’m hurting so much without him in my life it’s very hard to accept he is gone. I don’t know how I will live with this now.
November 4, 2017 at 7:49 am #176461LouiseParticipantLike I said he is a good guy deep down and he done the right thing even though he loved me so much. I thought a relationship was about working through problems and forgiving each other. I know I took my insecurities out on him and it was a mistake. But I was willing to overlook all of his mistakes and forgive him because that’s what you do when you love someone!! Why can he not do the same for me? There are far worse things I could have done.
November 4, 2017 at 7:17 am #176455LouiseParticipantI am to blame because what made me start the argument about his phone, he never gave me any reason to doubt him.
November 4, 2017 at 7:05 am #176449LouiseParticipantI would never go out of my way to argue with him as I hate arguing over stupid things. But after loosing him I have realised how I was treating him in the relationship and I could of done things differently, I am the first to admit my faults and believe me I always hold my hands up to them. I regret loosing him that day and if I could turn back the clock I would have never made him leave, I know I will pay for this for the rest of my life
October 27, 2017 at 9:51 am #175209LouiseParticipantHow do I start a thread?
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