Hello and Happy Day,
I’m sorry you are experiencing this. I know you can come out on the other side of this experience a stronger version of yourself.
I’ve recently been through the heartbreak of betrayal. I know there’s nothing like the pain and confusion of it. I can’t tell you what you “should” or “shouldn’t” do. Only your heart can direct the steps you take towards your own healing. I can share with you what helped and worked for me in my recovery. First, I sought professional help. I was aware I was in need of emotional tools I did not possess to get me through. Second, I watched videos on YouTube from “affairrecovery.com” those videos helped me make sense of everything I was feeling. It’s been almost a year for me. I am stronger, calmer and have realized how much “I matter” I wish you well. Joanna Lynne