Hello all,

I know I picked up a very old topic, because I found this is the most similar situation that I am now going thru’. We are married for 21 years now, have 2 children, 20 years and 12 years.  Wife does not want to contribute any money to family. In the first few years of our struggling time when we migrated 20 years ago from another country, my wife earned for first four years and was having joint account where all bills were paid from.  After the 2nd child was born,  she did not go back to work until last 5 years and since then stopped contributing any money saying my income is higher than her so she will use her income as her own allowance. She occasionally buys something for the kids but once in a while only. We have had lots of discussions/argument over the issue and she refuses to make any contribution.  Initially, she demanded explanation of expenses of her first four year’s earning and now justify her stand ( not contributing ) saying she puts physical labor ( cooking, cleaning, washing clothes etc.).  I do help her in cooking and our children help in cleaning and washing regularly.  On top of it, there is a regular interference ( several phone calls a day  enquiring  every tiny details of our family ) from her sister into our family affair (sorry to say that my wife gets easily dissociated by my sister-in-law).

Initially, in the beginning of our marriage ( arrange marriage ), I thought my wife will get more matured over time and concentrate more on our family ( me & kids ) rather focusing on her sister’s life & family.  The situation is so bad now that practically we don’t talk to each other ( read don’t like each other ), just hanging around because of the kids.  She keeps on bring up irrelevant issues on any argument to make mountain out of mole hills.  Foul languages, finding fault with me and kids is her daily routine now.   This is not going to be a healthy situation for the kids, and I don’t see any hope of improving the relationship in future.  Because, I love my children and concerned about their future, I think it is time for me to start thinking about separation rather dragging the unhealthy relationship anymore as this is affecting me, children physically and emotionally and might affect my career in the long run.

Please advise.

Thanks