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Alana

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Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)
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  • in reply to: Learning to mediate and have faith in loving again #127343
    Alana
    Participant

    Peter,

    Again thank you very much for your kind words and time to write to me. I love that ending quote by T.S Elliot. Its so true. And that’s what I want, to experience and learn and grow so much so that when I re-do any part of my life It’s as if experiencing it for the first time yet so much more knowledgeable, a wise deja-vu? lol. In speaking with my best friend over the weekend who will be joining me in the decade of the 30’s in a couple of weeks, we examined our lives since childhood and all of our experiences and how prepared, and wondrous of the new chapter in our lives. In wanting to FEEL more of life. Not just experience things visually but feel every moment and meaning of it. So I will do my best to keep faithful to the journey and each new chapter. I’m sure there is so much more to come. Moving to Chicago was such a whim, I could only imagine what other “I didn’t expect that” moments to come. Thank you again for listening. It’s the strangest things these forums, seeking advice from the unknown. But it’s an amazing outlet. Namaste

    in reply to: Learning to mediate and have faith in loving again #127183
    Alana
    Participant

    Peter,

    I was beginning to loose ‘faith’ that I would get an answer with understanding to what I was trying to ask. I thought “well they’re thinking I’m asking a very surface-y question”. So I’m grateful you responded.
    In reading your response I had a lot of “that makes sense” or “I kinda knew that” but doubted myself.
    I’ve heard about the movie Collateral Beauty with Will Smith right? I should check it out for a visual insight. And those books you recommended I will absolutely check out, I always love a good read especially if it can help answer questions, or give me a different perspective on topics about life, love, etc. I also appreciate the analogy with mother Theresa. And you made a valid point with “Fear is to courage as doubt is to faith”. It’s Something to keep in mind. Hell, to post in my apartment somewhere as a reminder!
    I was raised in a world where you question everything, and it was meant as a method of protection, but as I’ve gotten older I’ve noticed it can sometimes have the opposite outcome. Which is why sometimes I’m on the right track but boom I question it!
    I think you have a point on Redefining and truly understanding what faith is to me. Not putting this immense pressure on it. Just going with it. I’m sorry I probably sound scattered, just writing as I think, as I reread what you wrote. What I can say, is that I have every reason to have faith, we all have back stories and mine definitely although tough, screams “have faith”. And I don’t believe in a one kind/type of god, or entity. But I do believe in something much bigger than me. I believe in the beauty of this world even though it can seem ugly. I live in a studio apartment that I was blessed that it has a decent size roof that I use to mediate and I can see the beach from there, and I couldn’t tell you the amount of time I’ve spent there writing and feeling whatever I’m meant to. And I’m thankful that after such a long time of kinda going through the motions of a mundane life, I am now curious and thirst for knowledge. I just want to keep growing and understanding. I don’t ever want past experiences to taint me from the beauty of life and faith, as I’ve seen it do that to so many people that I love.
    Thank you again Peter, I enjoyed your reading your perspective. Thanks for the recommendations. And thanks for seeing my post as more than a “how can i get a man” kind of thing 🙂

    in reply to: Learning to mediate and have faith in loving again #127143
    Alana
    Participant

    Anita,

    My post is not only about meeting a man. As this is not a dating site. Its two questions in one topic. And sometimes it one doesn’t have advice to give its best to not say anything. Instead of saying I don’t have advice on that bec of …. etc.

    in reply to: Learning to mediate and have faith in loving again #127130
    Alana
    Participant

    Anita,

    Thank you for the suggestion. I have tried online dating before. Not for me lol. I meant more having faith that I’ll meet someone not outlets to meet them. Meeting men isn’t a problem, just the right kind of man is hard. Which is just common in the dating world I guess.

    in reply to: Learning to mediate and have faith in loving again #127129
    Alana
    Participant

    Brav3,

    I do appreciate your advice and outlook. I would like to say however, that my break was 3 years ago and my spiritual journey isn’t a direct reason for it. I’ve never looked at this as a fad or a way to get over something. I’ve delevoped myself on my own without any real thought to faith. I actually use to be really conservative Christian, until growing up and realizing that wasn’t for me. I’ve always felt a calling to nature and the universe, I do a lot of writing so self reflect and creativity as always within itself felt spiritual for me. I’ve just felt at this point in my life more drawn to it and learning more.
    But as far as your outlook and vantage point of mediating I do appreciate. Very informative and something for me to try. When I said grow In it I meant more so in my knowledge of it. I’ll def take your advice to heart. Thank you.

    in reply to: In a confuse state. #127053
    Alana
    Participant

    Hello Clemmonce,

    I can understand the pain of loneliness. I was in a relationship for 6 years and when It ended, I nearly ended. I had no life and couldn’t bare the thought of not being with this person. I took a big risk and left my home city of New York and moved to Chicago to get away, to start over.And that choice has grown me hugely. It was a long road but one I wouldn’t change bc of the change it did for me as a women. Now, I’m not telling you the solution is to move away but rather putting yourself first. The word you use the most in reference to your ex is “selfish” which means you were more selfless, so why not switch the roles. Why not become selfish and do the things that make you happy? Don’t you deserve that? Loneliness will come in waves.If you’re looking for it to stop altogether it wont, you just get better at dealing with it. It’s apart of life. I still almost 3 years later have my moments of loneliness, but it gets better. I promise you that. And 6 weeks isn’t enough time. Hell my first year after the breakup and I’d still have breakdowns. Healing takes time. It can be shorter for you than others or it may take longer. But the best answer I could give you is to put yourself first. To truly distance yourself from whats hindering you.It’s going to hurt, it’s going to be hard, but it isn’t impossible. It seems you have more than one reason to walk away rather than to stay.
    I’m sorry if this isn’t the best advice, I just want you to know that you are the most important person in your life and that is worthy of selfishness if it means protecting your heart and growing your spirit and confidence. Namaste

Viewing 6 posts - 1 through 6 (of 6 total)